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  • Jennifer Z. Major


Two weeks and one day ago, on a stunning, sunny Sunday, I was outside, wrestling an antique oak hutch, and having a blast with my sander, Spotify, and the beautiful Fall afternoon. It was a glorious day, and I accomplished quite a bit. I knew that the forecast promised a perfect week, and I had planned to finish the hutch and prepare it for the varnishing stage.

Two weeks ago, at 7am, Monday morning, I got up to visit the outhouse. Just kidding, we have indoor plumbing.

Two weeks ago, at 8am, everything went to hell in a handbasket.

I rolled over, and then BOOM! The "training an astronaut to go into space" spinning hit like a kick to my head. I did not let up for 5 solid minutes. It was so bad, I started to cry. Why? Because it felt awful, and I've had it before, but it hadn't been back for years.

I tried to get up. I made it to a sitting position, but I kept falling back onto the bed. Literally falling right over. That lasted 90 minutes.

After a long while, and yes, I held onto the sheets so I would fall off the bed (because that helped?) I had to make a dash to the bathroom, because I knew I was going to be violently ill. And yes, I was. It was medal worthy.

I made it back to bed by grabbing bookshelves, the bed frame, and the wall. .

By 9:30, I was still a wreck. But I was hungry. I am hypoglycemic, and I can't skip meals. But I knew that a trip downstairs was a totally stupid idea.

So, I called my husband at work. What did he do? Came home, and brought me breakfast in bed. Seriously, what a guy. He brought me the house phone, some tea in my Yeti mug, and told me to rest.

Resting was easy, moving was not. Even if I turned to adjust the pillows, or inched backward, I'd risk making myself sick.

But even that afternoon, I honestly thought the vertigo would dissipate and I'd be fine.

On the first day, I realized that my lips had gone numb, and the fever/chills/fever/chills started late that night.

It was not just regular vertigo. But since I know that nothing can fix it, I knew I had to tough it out.

My poor husband moved into the spare bedroom.

On Tuesday, I called my doctor. They said if it gets worse, to call back. By Thursday, I decided to call again, and they fit me in that morning. Bless them, seriously.

YES, I did the Epley Maneuver faithfully!! YES, it was the key to kicking the vertigo.

But, despite doing everything I was told-rest, Epleys, rest-it took another week for the spinning to stop.

It was also that long before I could read for more than a few minutes. Giant, laptop font was okay because I could make it bigger, and it didn't involve such intense focusing skills, but my Kindle app on my phone was too small.

By day 3 of it all, and when I wasn't in a spin-cycle, I moved my laptop to our bedroom and hello Netflix!

Over the week, I managed to be useful and folded laundry that was delivered right to my room!

I binged on a few series, and watched quite a few movies. "GeoStorm" was 45 minutes of my life that I'll never get back.

By Wednesday the 30th, I had stopped feeling spinny altogether, but my balance was still lousy. It's still not so great, but each day is better than the last.

I despise wasting time. And two weeks of it? Oh MAN!! But, I didn't have a lot of choice.

Once I could focus a bit better, I sent out a few queries. But other than that? I didn't get much done.

But I'm happy to report that I did some baking on Saturday, and the locals were rather pleased.

But now, its back to work!

And yes, I will pace myself. I promise.

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